


Life.

by shedhogs (Sonic_Rewritten)



Series: Sonadow Week 2k19 [1]
Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (Video Games)
Genre: Child Death, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, its not a hugely romantic fic, mostly me relating to shadow, the sonadow is unrequited (for now)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 06:11:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19245418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sonic_Rewritten/pseuds/shedhogs
Summary: Sometimes, things well up inside you, and you act impulsively.





	Life.

**Author's Note:**

> TW: CHILD DEATH AND SUICIDAL IDEATION.

_ Life. _

 

Life was not something Shadow had wanted, at first, after the death of Maria. The gruesome image of her body flying across the hall as a bullet shot straight into her side was seared into his mind…

Life, it seemed, had other plans.

 

The day he met Sonic was the day he finally found meaning again. At first, it was just rivalry that drove him to keep going, but as time went on… It became a desire to  _ be with  _ the blue hedgehog, a  _ need  _ to be close. He often found himself aching inside at the thought of Sonic eventually hating him for his heritage, for who his genetic father was. His heart was split in two, one side craving to be close to Sonic, the other pushing him away as he made attempts to accept his assumed fate.

Shadow often found himself brushing against the trigger of whatever gun he had laying around as defense, wondering if it would be worth it to end his immortal life, and avoid succumbing to darkness as he was seemingly destined.

 

Breath shaking, Shadow threw the handgun to the ground, putting his face in his hands and stifling back tears.  _ What was he doing?  _ He thought,  _ anything he tried would lead him to emptiness no matter what, whether it be the cold embrace of death, or the lack of a heart as he slaughtered thousands. _

The dark hedgehog wiped his face, sniffling and getting up. The urge to curl up and let the tears flow was ever present, but he persisted in, yet again, bottling himself up and refusing to show weakness. His hands shook, as he crossed them together and left the room. Rouge was probably waiting for him, and he wasn’t about to let her down by acting so….  _ feeble. _

 

To Shadow’s surprise, as the doors to the GUN cafeteria slid open, Sonic was sitting across from Rouge, chatting the bat up with a disproportionate grin on his face. Shadow narrowed his eyes and went to sit next to his co-worker. 

“Hey Shadow!” Sonic beamed, “Ho- Hey, are you doin’ alright, buddy? Your eyes are all red.”

“I’m fine, you have no reason to care, anyway.”

The blue hedgehog raised an eyebrow, one hand moving to caress Shadow’s, but stopped, and awkwardly rubbed the back of his head. “Well, I just thought…. Nevermind.” He sighed, folding his arms and leaned back in his seat.

Rouge placed a hand on Shadow’s arm, her gaze soft and worried, “You can tell us anything, hun, you don’t have to hide anything.”

Shadow’s head turned swiftly towards her, “You don’t need to care about me so much!” His teeth bared, he ripped his arm away from her touch, and sidled in the other direction.

His two companions looked at each other, before they looked back to Shadow.

“Shadow, we need to know what’s wrong,” Sonic placed his hand on the dark hedgehog’s, who tried in vain to get away, “We’re your  _ friends _ , Shadow. We care about you.”

_ Friend.  _

**_Friend._ **

Shadow’s thoughts were stuck to that word. 

No, he needed to answer them. No time for unrequited feelings.

He opened his mouth, mostly to retort; everything, eventually, came flooding out like a waterfall.


End file.
